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Hoagie

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Cat Poop Philosophy [Oct. 9th, 2009|02:33 pm]
Hoagie
My cat, Smokey, is perpetually in the moment, free of ambition,and regret. Lacking emotional trappings there is no incentive for him to change habits for the purpose of positive personal growth. For this reason I've chosen to invent (and accept as fact) a reason why I should not find fault in his shitting on the floor adjacent (leftwise) to his litter box.

My roommates are unanimous in believing that this is completely unacceptable behavior, and steps must be taken to correct him as soon as possible. In my opinion this is unfair anthropomorphizing. Every argument had with a loved one has been far worse to experience than any amount of cat shit I've ever stumbled upon. People leave lying emotional, atmospheric, and existential crap often in the middle of the room, in plain sight, and not once have I heard the notion that this is a forbiddable practice. Smokey at least has the common courtesy to leave his privately in a secluded corner of the upstairs bathroom. I regret that he has the burden of most people expecting him to act as humanly as possible with no hope of ever understanding what that means.

Lucky for him, at least, we have hardwood floors.
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(no subject) [Feb. 19th, 2009|08:25 pm]
Hoagie
Rules: Go to Google and type in quotation marks your name and then "likes to" (ex. "Steve likes to").
Type in the first ten things that come up and repost in your own note. Then tag 10 friends.

1) Michael like a good blowjob joke

2) Michael likes Thomas!

3) Michael likes his breakfast in the morning

4) Michael likes to sleep in a high-security environment

5) Michael likes roly poly sandwiches

6) Michael likes her, because she is charming and attractive

7) Michael likes to dance

8) Michael likes archery, movies

9) Michael likes to do is put six pit bulls together and see which five die

10) Michael likes Rosie when she's grouchy, and not just when she's nice
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Dear Livejournal [Oct. 9th, 2008|08:58 pm]
Hoagie
Dear Livejournal,

First, thank you so much for giving me a place to grow and write. You have been there in my lowest and highest moments; from my most literate, to nearly unintelligible. The thing is, I'm blogging somewhere else now. You just aren't offering what I need; I need to move on. Don't worry I'll still read all my friends posts diligently, but you know maintaining two blogs is as impractical as it is cripplingly pathetic. I hope we can still be friends. Take care; it's not you, it's me.

Ok, now that that's done with, please visit my new blog.

it is at http://hoagblog.wordpress.com/
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(no subject) [Apr. 9th, 2008|07:38 pm]
Hoagie
[& around my head |Jesus Christ Was An Only Child // Modest Mouse]

I had a dream the other night. Now, normally I don't express my dreams when I have them because, well, think about it, when was the last time someone told you about their dream and it was actually interesting? Maybe this will be the first occasion in a while for you, but maybe not. Either way, indulge me. What made it interesting (ok, to me anyway) was that I was in no way involved. The entire dream was like watching a movie, in the sense that I had nothing to do with it; I barely ever saw it in first-person.

A man was walking down a busy European looking street. I'm assuming it was European because the rock was all curiously uniform, implying that the rock was gathered from a quarry close enough to not require any tool preceding the industrial revolution. The streets were not nearly wide enough for two of any size car, and every street seemed to turn every which way, as if the city itself was deliberately attempting to confuse you. The man walks by a beautiful woman, (I say that, though I couldn't tell you what she looked like in any way) looks at her, thinks of approaching her, but doesn't. He goes to sleep that night and has a dream (yes, I was dreaming a fictional person's dream) that begins at that exact moment, but instead of passing her, he speaks to her, and a relationship follows. He is confused at first, but every time he falls asleep he dreams that alternate life. So he becomes obsessed with spending as much time as possible in sleep, and becomes overwhelmingly restless and agonized when he is awake.

Now here is what I have been really turning over. Is this a tragedy? On one hand, of course, he's become miserable whenever he's awake; naturally that's a problem. Though, How many people are miserable when they are awake anyway? Could it be he would be miserable if he didn't have the dreams? Who's to say he wouldn't have just been miserable perpetually, without that escape?



It's all beginning to resemble a perfume ad.
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IT HAS HAPPENED [Mar. 27th, 2008|09:33 pm]
Hoagie
[& around my head |Tom Waits // Martha]

I am officially burnt out on sports for the year, and the time has come where I go into sports hibernation until Football kicks off again. How do I know why?

I turned on the T.V. and the Western Kentucky was keeping pace with UCLA in the sweet sixteen, and I said to myself, nearing audability....




"Damn it, I wish the game would end. Jeopardy is on soon!"




...



Let the healing begin.
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(no subject) [Mar. 3rd, 2008|10:54 pm]
Hoagie
From the Guinness book of world records 2008:


"In 1985, Mr. Potato Head received four postal votes in the mayoral election in Boise, Idaho. However, he failed to win the election which is a good thing, as Mr. Potato Head is a toy manufactured by Hasbro."


Thanks for the clarification Guinness.
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Random Trivia [Feb. 17th, 2008|05:04 pm]
Hoagie
The other guy on the abbey Road cover died.
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Barack Obama [Feb. 16th, 2008|07:40 pm]
Hoagie
obama

He's a fan of Bob Dylan and Shakespeare.

Well, he's got my vote.

Is it that simple, yes, of course it is.
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I know not everyone who reads this cares about football, but... [Jan. 15th, 2008|01:16 pm]
Hoagie
Eli Manning is in the playoffs and Peyton Manning isn't!

Photobucket

It's a victory for younger brothers everywhere!
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Happy Holidays from wherever the LIvejournal servers are. [Dec. 27th, 2007|07:05 pm]
Hoagie
[& around my head |It's Not My Cross to Bear // Allman Brothers Band]

YEAR IN REVIEW

1-Did you kiss anyone?
God, can you imagine going a year without? How depressing.

2-Did you date anyone?
Pretty much the whole year, yes

3-Are you going to kiss someone when the ball drops?
Sadly, no.

4-Did you lose any friends?
No, not all at once, but some friendships seemed to have faded out.

5-Did you gain any friends?
Oh, yes, it's hard not to in the revolving door that is college.

6-Did you do something new?
Nothing huge or exciting, like skydiving or the like, but some small things.

7-Did anyone important to you die?
Yes.

8-Did you change?
Oh, yes. Maybe more than any other year.

9-Are you happy with the year over all?
The best I've had (No pressure 08)

10-Whats the best thing that happened to you?
Natalie, London, Acting

11-Did you fall in or out of love?
In.

12-Are you happy the years almost over?
It feels like it's been going on for three, so I'm not so much happy as relieved as surprised really.

13-Are you going to change something about yourself next year?
What kind of question is this? I don't know, probably.

14-Do you think 2008 will be a better year then 2007?
It will be rough to live up to, but maybe

15-How many things did you screw up in 2007?
Well I sure as hell can't say a number, probably over fifteen.

16-Did you go to an amusement park?
Drove by a few, but I don't think I've been to any.

17-Did you go to a concert?
More than usual. Bright Eyes, M. Ward, Arctic Monkeys, Queens of the Stone Age, BB King, and that's just this term.

18-Did you go to any parties?
I live at the Blue House, so whether I like it or not, I'm there.

19-Did you go on a summer vacation?
Not really, did classes and work.

20-Did you lie to your parents?
Nothing serious if much at all.

21-Did you get into a fight?
Meh, kinda. I haven't yelled at anyone (offstage, in anger) in a very very long time.

22-Did you leave the country?
Yeah, that one time for a bit.

23-Did you have a good birthday?
I haven't had a birthday party since elementary school, and no one felt like partying on my 21st.

24-Did anyone in your family get married?
Ha!

25-Do you think you grew?
No, definitely not.

26-Did you dye your hair?
Haven't started yet.

27-Who do you think you were on the phone with the most?
Natalie, who else.

28-Did anyone sing to you?
Maybe not, surprisingly. How does that not happen to theatre majors.

29-Did you sing to anyone?
Whether they liked it or not (They probably didn't)

30-Did anyone tell you they loved you?
Yes, thank God.

31-Did you ever go to the hospital?
I think so?

32-What did you drink and eat the most?
Water and sandwchs

33-Did you change your top friends at least 8 times?
Even once?

34-Did you change your profile over 10 times?
Facebook? maybe 10?

35-Did you change your default at least 20 times?
que?

36 - Did you get any new piercings?
Not cosmetic ones.

37 - Did you vote?
Not on anything significant

38-Did you stick to your New Years Resolution from last year?
I don't make them usually.

39. Think you'll date someone in 2008?
At least the one, yeesh.

40. Where will you be when the ball drops?
I don't know actually.

41. Do you think you will make new friends in 2008?
Hopefully a few.

42. Are you hoping to meet someone special in 2008?
How special exactly?

43. How do you feel, another year has passed you by?
Passed me by? What an unecessarily negative tone.
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